She stares in the mirror trying to see it,
… reflections of the girl they all know.
Trying to see what they all say they can see.
She looks deep into her own eyes, nothing.
Just brown… there, in the reflection.
As if there were any more ordinary unassuming color than “just brown”.
She sees nothing.
Her reflection is clouded.
She slowly scans upward to her brow, nothing… still.
She lowers her gaze to her left cheek, just below her eye, nothing… still.
A reflection she can’t see,
A beauty she doesn’t know.
A life she can’t feel.
A small beauty mark, that’s not it, she’s sure of that. Her mouth, maybe her mouth. She looks intently at it in the mirror, her smile… she has a nice smile. She sees it, but it’s not what makes her special. It’s not what they all say they see in her.
What they see is beyond her skin,
beyond her “just brown” eyes,
beyond her obscured beauty mark.
Still, she can’t see it.
She panics, a little.
She squints.
She wants to see her reflection.
She questions the realness of it… of her.
She blurs her gaze, looking straight through the mirror, keeping her eyes just out of focus — maybe now she can see it. She sees what she always sees — a little girl running away but from nothing to nothing. The same thing every time.
A chase, but she’s never caught.
An enemy, but she never see’s.
The safety, but she never reaches it.
But it’s there… in her reflection.
They all can see it…
and for now, that’s enough.