I think there must be something too difficult for us to discover when we learn to feel. Too difficult for us to see and think and believe. Learning to feel can make a sheltered heart heal. But it can also force you to realize why you sheltered your heart in the first place.
We hate and risk seeing the side of ourselves that shows our lack of understanding and empathy. To hate means you have lost understanding and acceptance. You have lost when you hate and if learning to feel leaves you lost in hate… you’re not feeling anything.
We love and risk losing ourselves to another’s whimsy. When we love we are free and open yet all at once scared and lost and wondering. Your heart can shatter and never heal — and there you are… back to learning not to feel.
We feel sadness and sorrow and get lost in it and no one knows why we’re sad because when we tell them, when we share our sense of sad with someone… we risk them being burdened by it too. Because people who feel, feel what the people they love are dealing with — some never had to learn to feel, they just do.
We feel happy and instantly want to share this feeling with the people we love. This is the feeling we want to give away like free cotton candy at the fair — before it melts and is gone, we want everyone to hold it close and feel it — it’s easy to learn to feel with happy.
When we learn to feel, we can’t choose the emotions that will chip away at the fortress forming around our sheltered hearts. Joy and euphoria from the people we love will topple those existing walls quickly. Yet we also have to accept the uncertainty and insecurities that come with happiness — for it will be replaced, if only temporary, by another feeling that may have us wishing for the fortress to quickly build back and surround us… keep us safe. When we learn to feel, we learn to feel it all. The anger, the sadness, the happy, the scared, the contempt, the love — the joy of newfound emotions.
Learning to feel can take your breath away and leave you shattered or it can build you up and help you grow — you grow when you feel. Growing means you are moving forward, it means your sheltered heart will open up and risk the pain of absence, it means you are learning to feel — and that is worth it all.
I found a few interesting places I thought you might like to visit:
- I really enjoyed this article and hope you will too, I think it goes nicely with learning to feel.
- I absolutely want you to watch this interview with Bindu Wiles, the mastermind behind the 21.5.800 adventure.
- I thought this was a hysterically brilliant idea — I’m going to do this, at least once anyway.
- Reading this made me realize, learning to feel can be scary for many people.
- And finally, this reminder from Kind Over Matter that feelings are everywhere — be gentle.