I’ve been reading “I Am An Emotional Creature”, by Eve Ensler. I’m not afraid to admit that before I even finished the introduction, I had formed a little crush. It’s basically a letter, to me — or I felt like it was to me. I’ve read that introduction many times. It has penetrated my thoughts. I am not an emotional creature.
Most people who know me — who have spent time with me, who have sat down to a drink with me, who have laughed with me — understand that statement. I don’t talk about feelings or thoughts or dreams — rather I didn’t. Not until recently.
I’ve been thinking about the concept of need lately. What it means to need people in your life. I need my kids. I need their smiles and laughter and tears and anger — I need all of them and I’m pretty sure they need me as well (I like to be needed). But, thinking about people who I “need” in my life has always been easy because there have been so few. I forget people, easily. I forget that I needed them for a while. I’m tired of forgetting.
The last year has been an emotional journey for me — I wish I could say it’s over but new chapters are being written everyday. I like to plan. I love the idea of those sports psychologists who help players see in their mind the way they want an event to happen, mental imagery — I do that. I know where I want my journey to take me, sometimes we can be our biggest stumbling blocks.
I started yoga about 3 1/2 months ago. I had never done yoga before and wasn’t sure if I would be able to handle the “kumbaya” of it. But, I had met some people who said all positive things about it — so I gave it a try. I think yoga might have saved me on several occasions since then. It has saved my health, physically and emotionally. I’ve been on a journey to reclaim myself and yoga has helped me stay focused and centered and reminded me to breathe — I like to be reminded to breathe.
So I thought I would share some things that I’m looking forward to in the upcoming year:
- I’m looking forward to a trip to spend time with my dearest friend in the world.
- I’m looking forward to relying on myself and being independent again.
- I’m looking forward to laughing everyday with my kids.
- I’m looking forward to chances to meet new friends.
- I’m looking forward to doing yoga.
- I’m looking forward to conquering the treadmill.
- I’m looking forward to smaller clothes.
- I’m looking forward to trips to the lake to feed the ducks.
- I’m looking forward to reading some great novels.
- I’m looking forward to all my tomorrows.
Now it’s your turn. What are you looking forward to?
First Pages 
There is something about you, Ms. B. Sain, that is just particularly wonderful. Those high school teachers you had were dunderheads. Sometimes, forgetting comes because we are afraid or reluctant to remember. Maybe you are now wanting friends and experiences that stay because you are strong enough, confident enough, and value yourself enough to accept those things. The yoga, I imagine, helps you both physically and spiritually on your journey. I am so admiring of you. I feel that I am witnessing the unfolding of a particular beauty.
That’s the most wonderful thing I think anyone has ever said to me Katherine!
Wow — I’m speechless. Thank you for always saying just the right thing.
I’m looking forward to meeting you someday soon.
We have some overlapping “looking forward to’s”:
1. Looking forward to feeling my kids are living a stable, happy life
2. Looking forward to going down 2 more clothes sizes.(one has happened, yay)
3. Looking forward to the better health feelings that should come with #2.
4. Looking forward to feeling OK in a bathing suit for the first time in a long time. Silly but I love water & refuse to get into a bathing suit!
5. Looking forward to the day I can say, Echo is fully house broken.
6. Looking forward to the day after shearing weekend.
It is such an intense, long job that the relief feels amazing.
7. Looking forward to finding the right words to go with the small piece of guitar music I have made in honour of 25 yrs. of marriage with my husband.
8. Looking forward to the opposite feelings of chaos once I solve this house-falling-apart problem.
I love love love your list Sue! Especially #6 (I would so love to be a part of that – even if it is intense!) and #7 — how awesome are you? You’ll find the right words — they’re fluttering around in your heart, you just have to let them out.
I feel so fortunate to be here to watch your lovely, though sometimes painful, transformation. You are a wonder to behold, dear Becky, and an inspiration in so many ways. I still haven’t learned how to really let myself be vulnerable enough to need, I want to be the giver, but I hope I’ll learn watching you.
I look forward to seeing what the future holds for you and our wonderful friends. I look forward to discovering new paths that I might take along the journey. I just… look forward, not back.
Thank you Dani. Looking forward is good — sometimes it’s more well lit.
as we change and grow
life around us changes too
a mirror of what we wish to see
I wish all the things you want to do you do
It is important to know what you need
and in that what we want to see on the road we are on
I look forward to love holding my hand
I look forward to a world away from the Vet Clinic, retiring after 28 years will be wonderful
I look forward to the wonderful things to come
I look forward to meeting so many of the wonderful
people who have changed my life, inspired me, fill me with laughter and joy
Thanks for being on this road… for waving your wonders for us to share 🙂
Thank you Luna for sharing your list. Your words are so poignant — I love reading them.
Thank you for taking the time to read this and for sharing a piece of you here.
1. I’m looking forward to learning more about my amazing twitter friends
2. I’m looking forward to getting more writing done
3. I’m looking forward to reading more from you
4. I’m looking forward to smiling more
Thank you
I love your list Simon especially #2 and #4, oh… and #1 sounds great and #3 made me blush — ok, so I love all your list!