Dear Superman (or Batman or Awesomeoneman or what ever you go by these days),
I wanted to write you a letter and introduce myself. I’ve been following your exploits for a while. Although, I guess being a superhero, it isn’t really called exploits… more like your job. Anyway, I’ve been going through some rough patches in life — nothing too bad… my house didn’t burn down, I haven’t been robbed, I have a good job. But still, life has a way of sometimes sneaking in some bad stuff just to keep us honest I guess. Life had been sneaking some bad stuff in on me lately. Now, I suppose when you get letters like this you are probably waiting for ”the request”, I assume people ask you for things a lot. You’re a little like Santa Claus aren’t you — people contact you when they need you, when they want something, when life gets bad? I guess that makes you feel kind of used. Well, maybe not this time.
You see Batman (or was it Superman or Awesomeoneman?), I’ve been sitting around in my own mess waiting for you to show up. I was under the impression that you could sense trouble, you know, spidey senses. So, I didn’t reach out to anyone… I stayed here, surrounded by my own mess. It kept getting bigger and I kept thinking it would level off or disappear or at least hide away for a bit while I regrouped. It didn’t. So I kept sending out these signals hoping you’d pick up on them, you being a superhero and all. It didn’t work. Maybe your super senses are off these days. I’m sure it’s hard being a superhero, you have a lot of people who need you and look up to you and want to just be near you, so… you didn’t pick up on my signals I was sending. That’s okay. I think my signals were crossed anyway. So, while I was waiting for you, a few things happened.
I panicked. I cried. I screamed. I panicked, again. Then… I paused. I looked around to see there were some things I could do myself — some things that didn’t require a superhero. I made some phone calls and talked to some people and stepped out of my mess for short periods of time — it felt good to be out there, away from the mess. But still, I returned to it because I thought you were coming. I thought if I stayed in the mess long enough you would pick up on those signals. Now, Superman, don’t get me wrong, I’m not questioning your superhero status, but maybe you need to not advertise your superpowers so much if you’re still fine tuning them.
Anyway, I waited some more. I sent out a few more signals. I panicked less and I cried less and I stepped out of the mess more — it kept feeling good. Each time I came back to take my comfortable position in the middle of the mess, it wasn’t quite as comfortable. There was less and less mess for me to sit in the middle of — the mess was disappearing. Then I worried that without my mess, you would never know I needed you. How would you sense my signal if I was cleaning things up for my self?
I’m not saying my mess is completely gone, it’s not been that easy. The mess is still here, but it’s easier for me to look at it and decide how to approach it from out here. It’s easier for me to see that it’s not that big and it’s conquerable… from out here. I don’t cry as much when I’m not sitting in the middle of it.
It’s strange, Awesomeoneguy, when I stopped waiting for you to fix it all for me, when I stopped waiting for you to fly in and protect me from it all… I realized you weren’t coming, I realized it was up to me.
Which brings me to why I wrote you this letter. I wanted to tell you thank you. I know that’s probably strange and sounds completely weird — and to be perfectly honest, I’ve been really mad that you never showed up. But… when you never came, when you ignored all my signals, I had to “do”. And I did. I am. So thank you for that.
I’m still waiting for you, but for a different reason now. My mess is vanquishable. I’m taking the steps to ensure that, now I’m waiting for you to see me… outside of the mess. It looks different out here — I look different out here. I’m hoping one of your superpowers is the ability to open your eyes and see.
Me (you’re a superhero, you know who I am… right?)
Super Rainbow Dork Girl
… And a song.
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